The Coach's Toolkit
Essential cheat sheets, scripts, and guides for navigating challenges.
Communication Tips for Addiction Support
CRAFT-informed ways to talk that increase motivation without enabling.
The Golden Rule
Reinforce Sobriety, Don't Punish Use.
CRAFT research shows: positive reinforcement of sober behavior is more effective than confrontation or punishment of use.
Don't Say
- "You're destroying this family."
- "If you loved me, you'd stop."
- "I can't believe you did this again."
- "You're just like your [parent]."
- "I give up on you."
Do Say
- "I really enjoyed our evening together last night when you were sober."
- "I noticed you chose not to drink at dinner. That took strength."
- "I love you. I'm not okay with the using. Both are true."
- "I'm here when you're ready to talk about getting help."
- "What would make it easier for you to [attend a meeting / call a counselor]?"
The CRAFT "Positive Communication" Framework
BRIEF
Keep it short. One topic at a time.
"I want to talk about one thing. Is now okay?"
POSITIVE
Start with something genuine and kind.
"I love spending time with you when you're present."
SPECIFIC
Name the behavior, not the character.
"When you came home intoxicated Tuesday, I felt scared."