How to Use This Script

This script is designed to be read aloud during your coaching session. "You" sometimes addresses you as the coach and sometimes your loved one — just as it would in a natural conversation. Speak it in your own voice; paraphrase where it feels right. Sections in blockquotes are exercises to do together.

You: "This week we're going to do something that therapists call a 'functional analysis.' It sounds clinical, but it's actually very practical. We're going to map out what triggers your loved one's use, what the use looks like, and what happens afterward."

You: "The key insight is this: substance use serves a function. It does something for them. It might reduce anxiety. It might numb pain. It might make social situations bearable. It might be the only way they know how to relax. Understanding that function is critical, because eventually we need to help them find healthier ways to meet that same need."

You: "Triggers come in two flavors:"

External triggers: People, places, times of day, payday, arguments, social events, certain friends
Internal triggers: Anxiety, boredom, loneliness, shame, physical pain, cravings, memories

You: "Consequences also come in two flavors:"

Short-term consequences of using: Relief, euphoria, relaxation, social connection, pain reduction (these are why they keep using)
Long-term consequences of using: Health problems, relationship damage, job loss, legal trouble, financial ruin, shame

You: "The trap is that the short-term consequences are immediate and powerful, while the long-term consequences are delayed. The brain is wired to prioritize immediate rewards. That's not weakness — that's neuroscience."

You: "Let's fill out the chart together. Think about the last few times your loved one used. What happened right before? What did the use look like? What happened right after — both the 'good' (from their perspective) and the bad?"

Compassionate Inquiry: The Compassionate Pause

You: "Gabor Maté talks about the difference between reacting and responding. Reacting is automatic — it comes from the survival brain. Responding is conscious — it comes from the part of you that can observe what's happening. The space between the two is where healing lives."

You: "Here's a practice I want us both to try this week. When you feel that surge — the frustration, the hurt, the 'here we go again' — instead of acting on it, try this:"

CI Exercise: The Compassionate Pause

Pause. Put your hand on your chest. Feel your heartbeat.

Name it. 'Right now I am feeling ____________.'

Locate it. 'I feel it in my ____________ (chest, throat, stomach, jaw).'

Ask. 'What story is this feeling connected to? Is this about right now, or is this old?'

Choose. 'What do I actually want to happen next?'

You: "This is not about suppressing the emotion. It's about creating a gap between the trigger and the response — everything else is just reaction.”

Go Deeper

Binaural Beats — Between Sessions

The Alpha Wave Music Studio has tracks built around binaural beat frequencies across the full range: theta for deep rest, alpha for calm focus, beta for sustained attention. Supporters of people with active addiction often live in a chronic stress state — cortisol elevated, sleep disrupted, hypervigilant. Binaural beats are a low-effort, passive way to interrupt that cycle. Use them before the functional analysis work, when you need to think clearly about patterns without the emotional charge that the material carries.

Open Alpha Wave Music Studio [blocked]

For Clinicians: Binaural beats require stereo headphones — the left and right channels carry different frequencies, and the brain generates the perceived third frequency from the difference. Isochronic tones (a single pulsing tone) do not require headphones and may be preferable for clients with sensory sensitivities, auditory processing differences, or who find stereo headphones activating. Both are available in the Alpha Wave Music Studio.